How Lucky People … Get Lucky

“He’s so lucky. How does he do it?”

I listened to a Ted Talk the other day. Given by a professor from Stanford University who teaches a course on, “How lucky people … get lucky.”

She opened her talk telling this story.

She was on a plane flight. Her normal routine? Earphones … immersion in her computer. But this time there was a distinguished looking guy sitting next to her. To her own surprise she uttered, “Hello” … her eyes connecting with his. A conversation ensued. Sixty days later? That guy sitting next to her on that plane published a book of hers that sold over 1,000,000 copies!

Seemed so simple? The word “hello.” But this is something so few us take the initiative to experience. Appreciate. Taking the emotional risk to reach out to others … in particular strangers. Just to say, “Hello.”

A young senior at my alma mater, Trinity College was asked to speak at Commencement a few years ago. Not because he was the valedictorian. Not because he had even been a great student. But because he had an important message to share. The title of his talk … “It all begins with … ‘Hello!’”

Here’s the essence of his speech … and I paraphrase.

I was walking on the “Long Walk” (a stone walkway along Trinity’s quadrangle) early one morning. A short African American woman approached as she was walking her small dog. I could have merely nodded. Casually whispered “Hi.” Even kept my head down and simply passed her by. But as is my custom, I greeted her smiling with my usual volume and gusto … “Hello!”

She stopped. “Hello!” she replied. We talked. Nice day. What’s your puppy’s name? She asked me what year I was. Then I asked her, “Are you a professor here?” She replied, “Yes, I do teach. But I’m also the president of the College.

The president of the College … Pass her by? And I’d never have known. Would have missed an opportunity. Since then she and I have developed a great friendship. (While giving his speech, he waved and shouted “Hello!” to his friend in the audience. She then waved and called back to him, “Hello!”)

Moments we all have all chosen to be open or be closed. A little relationship tension? Always. But just like the young man above … you never know who you might be interacting with. Saying “Hello” to.

I’ve made it a practice to remain open, be aware of all those brief moments. At a bar … in the barbershop. Or while on a plane. 

During a flight of mine recently, I was seated across the isle from a very large black man. He had head sets on, but I couldn’t resist. Taking a risk I nudged him and asked, “Who did you play for?” He smiled … “The Boston Red Sox.”

He was Lee Smith. Fireballing relief pitcher who was inducted into The Baseball Hall of Fame in 2018. A long conversation followed.

What was your best pitch? Who was the toughest hitter you faced in your career? What was the toughest thing about baseball for you?

Fascinating. Lee was so open. Actually so energized by my reaching out to him. Two hours flying, talking, sharing stories. As we landed, he and I were still engaged. Exchanged emails. No contact following the trip … but what fun this chance meeting had been for me! Him too.

 And it all began with “Hello”

Why are some people so lucky? Well, maybe they simply attract lucky things their way. Certainly one way? By just reaching out to someone and simply saying … “Hello!”

Try it.