Zoom!! “Why don’t we just do a Zoom call.” Today? Maybe 3, 4 times a day … I’m asked to have a Zoom call. With a coachie, a group, a friend for “cocktail hour.”Hey! Now we don’t have to drive anymore to see one another. Worry about that reserving for lunch. “Is there room at the bar?”Technology to the rescue! “I think that’s spinach caught in your teeth.”I may exaggerate here a bit. But the chatter these days is that much of our world post COVID19 will be so great. Go virtual! Never did I think my underwear would be my new version of “bus’ casual.

This virtual conversation reminds me of one of those things that creeps into our lives. That may not be all that great in the final resolve as we think it is.

I’ve been concerned about our younger generations today and their difficulty feeling. Really feeling others. Empathy. Sadness. Feeling others. I ask my grandchildren now in their teens, “Are you going out with someone? Dating?” “No we just ‘hang out’ in groups.” Then I remember “puppy love.” Those special few gals I dated in high school. Whether I ever got to second base or not. So old fashion?

It just seems the devices in our lives have made us more mechanical, more distant from one another. Yes? Or no.Back to Zoom. A byline in yesterday’s paper. “Our world will never be the same after the pandemic. All those office buildings will be less full, maybe even empty. Businesses are running effectively. Our people are ‘connected’ virtually. Think of the savings. All the rent. All the furnishings. All of it!”Ok. On the surface? Logical. I have all I need to get my work done in my “devices.” Virtual business, interaction has arrived. Big time! Is that person I talking to real? Or a robot.

”Well … let’s give this a little more thought. All this new way of connecting with one another may be what I call … “empty relationship calories.”

Our relationships might be like watching a movie. I get it. But it’s not real. Just a movie. I can leave it. Go get my Coke Zero and turn it off whenever I please. Here’s what I think are the potential gains and losses of going “virtual:”

The Gains …

• Money savings.

• Speed putting a “meeting” together.

• Showing up in pajamas, shorts … maybe even without either.

• Petting your dog while conferencing.

• Easier to take “breaks.”

• Not having to suffer bad breath from the guy next to you.

• Checking your iPhone during meeting … undetected.

• Less chance those inter office romances will blossom.

 The Losses …

• Less Spontaneity, collaboration. Creativity.

• Not seeing the whole person. Their hand gestures, their warm smile.

• Casual interaction … no office hopping.

• Less trust.

• Not fully feeling the energy (warm? cold?) of another.

• Observing how others handle interpersonal challenges. “Clean up your own lunch dishes, please!”

• Just lack of sharing person energy.

 These are my pluses and minuses of our emerging virtuality. Come up with your own. It shouldn’t surprise you if you’ve read any of my stuff. That I am passionate about real connection. God’s intended way we should live with one another. How we feel each other’s presence, humanness. Virtual may be here to stay. But the next time you need to dispose of a dirty diaper after that Zoom, think how good that cluttered office at the office looks now. Virtual may be the “in” thing. But my bet is like “empty calories” we may be consuming, eating wrong foods? We may find lack of true human interaction while “virtual” may yield more empty relationships too.