Harvard came out with a 72yr study recently. “1 Secret to a Fulfilling Life ” What did they conclude? The secret?… Love. 72 years, one word, love. Hmmm, how bout that. Further, “Good relationships keep us healthier, happier.”

If you’re fortunate to have on or two people, relationships in your life you can share all with, trust all with, your are gifted. I had my one in my life. Hope you do or will too.

His name was Peter. He and I attended the same prep school, same college. Amazingly, we never knew one another until magically we met for the first time shortly after my family and I moved to Hartford, CT in 1981. Peter was a large person. In physique, personality, and above all in spirit. I loved Peter. Peter loved me. Simple as that. We trusted each other… completely. Yeah we had our ups and downs too. Thankfully. The relationship should I say was “lubricated” by hilarity, tears, hugs (not man hugs … real ones). Too much Dewars Scotch, on too many occasions. Peter was wise. He was sensitive, caring, empathetic. A great listener. He brought this out in me. Other things too.

I was accountable, practical, less of a risk taker. We complemented each other. He could step into my space and know me. I could do the same for him. You can only grow in relationship with another person. We did. We loved each other so.

Peter died of cancer, two years ago last January. Our friendship lives on. In me. You see … as I always know. The events, people in our lives move on … the emotions, the memories, ability to recall them never do. Think you agree. Moreover, Peter was jovial, fun loving. He remains to this day in my spirit, in my soul just as he was. I was kind of a stiff… not all the time. He was a party guy.

We’d play golf, kinda. Racquet ball, kinda. Picture two, not in great shape, 200+ pounders pirouetting on a court. Got it? Didn’t care. We were together. Immersed. Traveled together with our families. Had gestures, sounds we exchanged that only we understood. Like a greeting we had for each other, “Ehhhhhhhh!!” Huh? People thought we were nuts. Because we were! Trinity College our alma mater was in Hartford. I served in a number of alumni capacities while there … Peter succeeded me in most of these roles. Like twins might do. Mirroring experiences. Oh forgot to mention. We were so many times mistaken for twins. “Oh no!” we would howl, “You’re a mirror?!”

Absolutely hilarious. One of my favorite memories? Highlight really. Our “seagull trips” to my place on Amelia Island. Our “Seagulls” were birthed from the book, Jonathan Livingston Seagull about a bird who flew to wondrous heights above the clouds and learned who he was. We would share our dreams and our desires, our victories and our defeats. Fly high. Lots of Dewars helped “lubricant” these times too. We were intimately, yes guys, intimately connected. Every time we left one another, “I love you, boy.”

I’m picturing him right now. Tears, chuckles. Such impact. He moved me to share this with you this morning. If there’s a Peter in your life. An extension of you… a core piece of you that helps you learn who you are, you’re blessed.

I was. I am. The goodbyes of yesterday and the hellos today with my dearest friend remain in my heart. The secret of a fulfilling life. Love you Peter.

Thank you …